6 Strategies When Narcissists Are Not Letting Go

Beware of narcissists who hover and try to pull you back. Breaking up with narcissists does not always end the relationship. Most people will not let you go even when they are out of the relationship and they are with a new partner. They do not accept “no”.

They try to re-establish a relationship or remain friends after a divorce or divorce. Research has shown that narcissists and psychopaths tend to be friends with their ex for selfish reasons. They try to persuade you to stay in your life or cheat and come back. They will do whatever it takes to get you back.

This behavior is called hovering after the famous hover vacuum, because when you finally get rid of the abusive relationship, they will suck you back.

Get ready for a bait and switch maneuver. Being expert manipulators, narcissists know your weaknesses.

They appeal to your feelings on important dates or anniversaries with help, romantic gestures, messages, or shouts for cards or gifts. They try to seduce you by promising you financial aid, false compassion, pleading, jealousy, sex, kind words, or reform. They can use “flying monkeys” – friends and family to send masked messages through social media posts, organize “unexpected” meetings in ghosts in your area, or bid for them. When that doesn’t work, they use threats, guilt and shame to exhaust you.

If you still love or are in love with your ex and expect the relationship to improve, you run the risk of sucking again. Victims of violence often return and are abused again. Do not be fooled. If you are strong, they can show their true color and go on the attack.

Why Narcissists Hoover
Power-driven narcissists are athletes, and this is another power-game. Thus, hovering is entirely predictable, because narcissists are deal deals. They have no empathy and no ability to see you as a separate person. Rather than wanting a relationship for emotional reasons, they are looking for access to resources such as sex, money, information, status or love. Their impulse is practical and their own dependence.

They need their narcissistic supply. Their fragile ego needs constant reassurance and attention to avoid feeling their inner emptiness – a vampire sucks the blood of its victims and they need a lot. Male narcissists in particular can fly from one woman to another for validation and / or sex.

In addition, if they do not decide to leave, rejection will not be tolerated. They see it as a disgrace because of the shame and insecurity that lies beneath them. Rather than admitting that they “leave” you, they make a mistake and “shoot” you. Similarly, they often kill your character and spread lies and turn family and friends against you to elevate themselves in the eyes of others.

Once they leave, they can try to win you back to regain their self-esteem and power. Knowing that you think or talk to them soothes their wounded ego. If you go back, as soon as they feel safe, they will lower you or break the narrative.

what to do
Hoover can be very harmful. Narcissists confuse you with lies and distortions to illuminate the gas for their own purposes. It perpetuates the narcissistic abuse you endured. Because of the dynamics of previous relationships, you can easily be persuaded by false promises, gestures, fears or threats if you do not go, or you may feel ashamed and blamed because you feel so unworthy and unlucky. To return to your former life. Vibration-bonding increases your risk, making it very difficult to leave an abuser.

  • The best way to deal with navigation is to ignore it. No relationship protects you and helps you recover from a breakup. That includes not looking at your ex’s photos or social media accounts. The narcissist intensifies hovering, then loses interest and reappears after a year or more only when needed.
  • If you have to communicate, for example, if you have business or public children, become an ashtray. This removes any incentive for a narcissist to pursue you in love. It is best to communicate in writing only. Be attentive, short and personal, and do not laugh or laugh at their jokes or attempts to seduce and ridicule you.
  • Be careful about idealizing your ex-girlfriend or making the relationship feel romantic. Arm your mind against falling in love, cheating, or making false statements about yourself and the relationship. Remember your unhappiness and any abuse you have suffered.
  • It is important to make fun of the truth by lying so that you learn to trust yourself again and not question your own feelings. Resist any attempt to distort the past. Write a story about what really happened and why you were unhappy.
  • Get professional help to restore your self-confidence and heal PTSD and relationship injuries and injuries from your childhood.
  • Write down your feelings about Narinna’s behavior and share them with your family members and memories of your past. If you can make a connection, shift your mind from your childhood to emotions when you miss your ex.
  • Remember that narcissism is a personality disorder. Narcissists are no different for you and certainly not without years of focused therapy. You need to raise your self-esteem in the first place.

    © DarleneLancer 2021

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