You may have heard the same advice over and over again after separation. If you want to get your ex boyfriend back you should ignore him. At first glance it makes no sense at all. How can a man who has been neglected decide that he wants you back? The opposite seems to be the case, isn’t it? Internally you feel that this is the best time to call your ex-boyfriend and pick up the phone to propose to the two of you. But everyone is shouting at you not to do that. You are confused, you feel desperate, you are anxious to make the mistake of losing the man you love. Before you do anything, you need a brief and concise lesson on male psychology. There is a good reason you should pay attention to those who tell you to forget your ex-boyfriend’s phone number, address and place of work.
You are no longer in control of your failed relationship
The person who pursues his ex-partner after separation does not control the future of the relationship. As women we often wish we could spend our lives between the pages of a love novel. The moment we pick up the phone we think our ex-boyfriend can’t live another day without us. The problem is that if you keep chasing him it will not happen in reality. Your actions actually speak louder than your words at this point, and your actions shout out a loud message, “I’m desperate, I do not care who knows.”
He is in complete control of what happens next. If he decides to ignore you, he instinctively knows that you are going to speed up your efforts and pursue him. Essentially you tell him that you are trying so hard that he ignores you. Your life revolves around him and it feeds his ego. Many men in this position are not in a hurry to give their ex-girlfriend the time of day because they want to see how far she will push in trying to win him back.
You need to change the dynamics of the relationship so that you control the future. The best way to do this is to change your behavior. You will be really surprised how quickly he decides that he needs you when he suddenly believes that you no longer need him.
There is so much more to ignore than not answering your ex-boyfriend’s text
One of the mistakes that many women make before changing any relationship with their ex-boyfriend is to tell him their intentions in a way that makes him realize that it is more than just a sport. If you tell your ex-boyfriend that you will not talk to him anymore and you do it while you are too emotional, he will consider it as a ploy to get him back. His competitive nature will be exaggerated and he will start his own journey to ignore you. It may have been weeks or months before you knew it and you would both be stubborn enough to get close to the other.
It is better that you get off the ground. The best advice you can follow is to decide one moment when you are not going to talk (which is good now) or try again with your ex boyfriend for at least a month. Do not let anyone know that you are doing this because mutual friends love gossip, and your ex-boyfriend will once again realize that you are not using any relationship as a tool to remind him how much he wants you.
Over the next month, try your best to focus on something positive and rich. Sitting down in memories of the time you two were together is very tempting, but it will not accomplish anything effective for you. This should be a month to rediscover who you are as a woman, and connect with what you want out of life.
Redefine what your life goals are when you move away from your ex
When you start the journey of ignoring your ex-boyfriend you will get some welcome surprises. First and foremost, you will be shocked at how he responds. Usually a man wants a woman he no longer wants. Once you realize that you have stopped your endless quest to regain his love and devotion to your ex-boyfriend, he will be ready to regain your heart. The way it works is amazing. Men are notorious for things they can’t reach in life. When one of those things turns out to be an ex-girlfriend, a man kicks his charm into high gear in an attempt to win her over. Basically, if you take away the knowledge you need from him, he will start questioning who you need. Once that happens, he comes back to you in full force and tries to get you to explain to him what has changed.
The other, more welcome benefit of ignoring your ex-boyfriend is that in an emotionally unfriendly way, you will be able to decide if reunion is really what you want or want. A month after separation things look and feel very different. Your feelings are resolved, your future is less defined and you are open to a whole range of possibilities.
Giving yourself the opportunity to take a breather from your ex-boyfriend is the best gift you can ever get. Eventually you will be able to decide what is best for you and whether reuniting with him is the best way to make your romantic dreams come true.